my dream shoes
3:07:00 PM
I'm sOoo in love, so help me god!
This is my new obsession.
Been pondering for days now whether i should get this GORGEOUS Moulin Rouge-ish 4" pumps. I want to buy it in slinkylicious scarlet RED. Suweeettt! It would just about complement an all-white ensemble perfectly. *purrs*. Double suweettness.
MMmm, mMMmm, mmmMMm, mMMmmm, mMmmm.
Should i get it? Shouldn't i?
tired.
4:47:00 AM
Time check, err 04.45 am. Okay, officially EXHAUSTED. Finally changed my ole-dusty skin to this one. * rubs her neck *. Next change? Wooiiiii, by golly ~ that might take another 6 months, maybe more. Summoning enthusiasm for this was hard enough. But i like it, very me.
Desperately need sleep now . I would give a thousand dollars to be able to jump into a comfortable bed with soft feathery pillows and thick,warm covers. Instead i'm here, in my shivered bum et al trying to nap in this high-back
' i definitely can't sleep in it' chair.
* boo hoo *. I feel for you, yes any of you night shifters out there.
Well, Singapore won. After the disappoinment of Pool's defeat on Saturday, Singapore's victory was a redeeming salve. Viva la Singapore. Hands up for those who did the Kallang Wave, felt good didn't it ? Brings back the good ole' memories of those Malaysia Cup days and then some huh ?
:)
all set...
3:05:00 AM
My favourite song just played on Class. Elton's ' Your Song '.
*sighs*. It is THE most perfect song. So simple yet so achingly sweet. I hope you don't mind that i put down in words, how wonderful life is now you're in the world. :)
He is a changed man. From the first time i met him to now. He has changed so much for me. Tell me, is it crazy to say i'm more in love with you now than i was before? I think that IS crazy. Urgh! This coming from a commitment phobe. But i thank you for changing that much. For letting go of all your initial qualms & aloofness. God knows i can't be with someone who's detached.
Not forgettin , i thank you as well for my newest pair of Converse with would go soOo well with my new shirt.Heh. Macih ehh :)
Okay,okay before i hear collective sounds of puking, help! I'm in over my head. Where the heck should we go for the honeymoon? I want to go New York but he's disagreeing reluctantly. He knows how much i want to go there but he is quite adamant it isn't really an ideal honeymoon spot. Hey going to 21' or sipping coffee at Greenwich Village sounds like fun to me. San Fran ? Nada to that as well, too common. Nothing much except for err, Fisherman's Wharf or a drive down to Santa Monica or the Golden Gate Bridge.Carribean maybe?? Too expensive to fly out from Singapore. Europe? The exchange rate is just about enough to leave us utterly penniless. A friend suggested Sweden since he's going there for his. Swedish kronos,smaller in value than Singapore's plus climate's cool. I mean like everywhere's cooler than Singapore right? * sheesh *. I kind of fancy a trip to Africa actually. Something different. Being in nature like that should probably bring out our animalistic tendencies which i happen to think is ALWAYS good for a honeymoon you know.
Heh heh.
Alaaa Bora Bora it shall be then. ;P
nice birthday...
1:14:00 AM
I had 2 briliant, sharp retorts all typed and ready to be posted. But i decided against it. Why? Heck. I don't even know myself. Age catching up i guess. That must be it. Kinda tired with all these speculation, expected explanations bla..bla..bla. My own mum was surprised when i told her everything. She stood rooted and exclaimed " You! You're not going to say anything ? I'm surprised Farah. " Yeah mummy, i shall not. Instead, i'll leave it to Him.He knows best. What good would it do me ? Nothing i think. It will never stop if it is encouraged. Best course of action i tell myself, " Will this be important to me 1 year down the road ? ". No. End of story. It sure does not get any easier than that. They teach you that in yoga. To feel stress-free, just let go. Relax, concentrate on your breathing and let go of any anger/hate or etc. It works like magic, everytime.
I like to write at this time of the morning. Especially so if 95's playing in the background. It all seems to flow effortlessly. I was just thinking of a good friend just now,last night and for many days now. Her mother passed away recently with her father just a few years back, leaving her an orphan at a grand old age of 26. I know many others lose their parents half her age but she's a good friend and i am worried. Despite everything, she seems all right. That's just the way she is. Calm, cool and composed. But God knows what she's going through. I can NEVER imagine losing a parent. Even if one is not especially close to them. In her case, she was close to both of them being the youngest child. Their pet. You know what i'm thinking ? That she'll not have someone who loves her unconditionally, someone who'll take her side no matter what, to give her comfort in the way only a mother can. I don't want her to be alone. Even offered her a place/ room on my house if she is ever lonely. But being the fierce independent girl that she is, she just smiled and said, " I'd rather sleep in my own bed with my parents' pictures close to me. " I guffawed to that. Almost cried. I feel helpless. I do not know what to do to ease her anguish.In the meantime, i'll just listen to her and pray with all my heart her pain will soothe in time. It will i'm sure but it doesn't make me worry any less. *sighs*. I DO NOT like being helpless. Urgh!
We all will lose our parents one day or another. Insya'allah our parents will live all long and prosperous lives. Panjangkanlah umur mereka, sihat wal'afiat. Insya'allah. To those gone, they will be remembered and hopefully they are in a better place now.Amin.